likemybooks | synflux IC Inbox

[Taryon's eyes shoot open when Astarion isn't aiming to the side of his mouth; he's going straight for the lips. The last time it happened, his hands were around Taryon's neck while the latter was rapidly coming to a surprising conclusion. Here, the reason is known, the goal is well telegraphed, and--

He can actually be very gentle.

This is what being fully desired is like; it has been years since Taryon could remember how it felt. It's a vulnerable thing, to be open to a kiss and to see the same openness on another's face.

Taryon turns his head away, eyes quivering while he processes it. Taryon is no innocent virgin; he has been kissed before, but it has been so long since he could feel the love behind it.] Ahem. I...

[To hell with it. Taryon tilts his head to rest his lips on the bridge of Astarion's nose. It's technically a kiss, but more importantly, they can cuddle comfortably in this position.]

[Taryon's heartbeat is fluttering, and though he looks away he doesn't seem bothered or upset. Astarion cups his cheek, thumb running along it, and when he turns back his next kiss is to his nose. Quite unexpected, and he makes a small sound in the back of his throat.

That was very nice. Maybe he liked that more than the forehead.

His hand runs back into Taryon's hair, carding delicately through it to hold the back of his head lightly. He turns his head up, out of Taryon's cuddle not realizing his attention, catching his lips again. A little more heated, lips a little more pliable, inviting.]

[Taryon draws into Astarion as his fingers comb his hair and cup his head. It's safe; he feels protected by this roguish man despite the fangs, despite the knives, despite his history that should turn away all wise men.

Then their lips meet once again, but what was once delicate caresses is now wetter. It's deeper. Taryon is pulled into a wanting gesture, not thay it feels bad, but he thinks of the roller coaster and the sudden drop of thr first hill. There must be thrill that comes after the frightening change. He just has to wait for it to happen.

For now, Taryon lers his most remain closed but relax, testing what Astarion offers.]

[They're close enough now their feet touch, knees brush against each other. He finds himself wanting to be closer, to ease a leg between his, put his hand on his back and urge him to roll on top of him...

But he needs to be slow. Taryon can be nervous, probably is nervous, he can't just go right from gentle kisses to body-on-body.

He continues to kiss him like this, turning his head one way, then the other, testing how they can slot together. Still slow, lingering kisses, until he finally parts his lips to trace the tip of tongue across Taryon's lower lip.]

[Taryon has gotten used to the rhythm of Astarion's head shifting one way and another. Each new movement alights different points on his sensitive lips, both terrifying and exciting.

Although, it's a pretty serious step from the sleepy kisses they exchanged just a minute ago. He's learning that Astarion is very good at this, maybe he should consider kissing more often instead of holding out--

Something wet touches him, and Taryon draws back before realizing that he had just been the recipient of kissing with tongue.] AH- Did you just--?

[His expression falters. This has crossed the line from interesting to uncomfortable.]

I think it's a bit too early for that? [His polite way of saying "please don't, that's weird."]

[He's taken aback by that reaction, and his brows furrow.]

That was too far?

You were licking me.

[He tries to find the eroticism in that, but in the moment, he's failing.]

Can we go back to kissing?

[What Taryon says is so incongruous with the current moment for Astarion he stares blankly at him. Then:]

You haven't kissed with tongue before?

Yes! [...Hold on, he has to think back on whether he enjoyed it.] Maybe? Someone tried it before, but it just felt slimy and gross.

[Oh, gods, does he truly have another Sebastian on his hands? He chuckles, letting his hand slip from Taryon's head to his neck, resting it there.]

It's true it's not the most cleanly of things, but same can be said of sex overall. [A grin, promising ] But with the right person the pleasure can outweigh that.

[He sighs. Astarion has a point - when he actually enjoys a sexual encounter, he can overlook the sticky and messy parts.]

I know, I know. But we don't have to do all of that on our first night. It's about the right person in the right moment, right?

[A quirk of the eyebrow. Please agree that was a clever phrasing.]

I suppose so.

[There's no enthusiasm or true agreement in his voice. He feels...lost?

He sits up, worrying his upper lip for a moment as his gaze focuses on the cracked open window curtains.]

Astarion?

[Tary also sits up and peers through the window.]

Did you see something?

What? [He blinks, turning his attention back to him.] No, I--

I was just wondering. Is there something wrong with me?

That's [Not a question he'd think to ask on a small date night.] ...I think something better to ask a therapist. I mean, nothing wrong with it, but I know a guy on base who's helped with these sort of questions.

...I don't think there's anything wrong with you. A bit irritating at times, but...I think you're doing okay considering your...life.

No, Taryon, that's not what I meant.

[He gives him a pained look. All that may be true, but that's for him to dwell on later.]

Wasn't this the right moment? [Pause.] I'm not the right man?

[He tilts his head.] For...the kiss?

[Wasn't Astarion the expert on sex, or something?]

I liked what we did earlier, to be honest. It's kind of...fast, to jump to this sort of intensity. [His head shoots up when he realizes something.] Are you afraid it'll be too late if one of us disappears?

[...........]

...Well, now I am!

[He breathes out, trying to think how to word this without sounding utterly pathetic, but he isn't sure there is a way.]

No one... no one has turned me down. And they were all people I didn't care for.

What? [His head turns sharply downward.] Oh. [It tilts as he grits his teeth.] Shit.

[That made things worse. Before he can think about responding to the second part, Taryon reaches for Astarion's hand and grips it tightly.]

I'm not turning you down, I swear. I mean- I like just staying together like this. I don't...I don't feel like doing much else right now.

[He doesn't know what to say for a moment. It felt like hours before he could say something, and he couldn't even look Astarion in the face as he does.]

You're content to be with me all night...like we were. No sex.

[There's disbelief in his voice. Disbelief, confusion, but also consideration.]

...Yeees? [The turn of his head is slow, his voice uncertain that he's hearing what he thought he heard.] I'm not - I'm not really into having intercourse immediately.

[A pause. Taryon looks down at his lap.]

I'm not interested in you just for that.

[Of course he knows there are people like that, who don't get wooed into having sex on first blush. But he has to convince those people to give up on that ideal, to join him, come to the palace...

No. He doesn't have to. He doesn't have to do that any more. He isn't trading his body for anything. Taryon only wants him for him.

He leans in, wrapping his arms around Taryon and pressing his face into his shoulder.]

[Taryon startles at the hug - not the response he expected in what he though was the midst of a serious conversation, but it's a good sign. He raises a hand to rest on Astarion's arm.]

...This is also nice. [He's held. He's being held like he's important and that's the greatest intimate act he can imagine on this night.]

[He's worried for a moment he'll be pushed away, but he isn't. Instead he touches him with his warm hand.]

It is. I really do like this.

[Just spending a night with him, like before when they were merely friends. But with a little more to it. More affection, more gentle touches and sweet kisses.

Not feeling like he has to do more.

He has a similar sensation in his chest as the moment Taryon said he wanted to try being with him. With wonder, he says into Taryon's shoulder:]

I feel happy.

[Taryon's smile curls like a happy cat's. A weight in his arms, a body holding his as if he were a precious person - it's been years since he felt like this. Men who got physically close, men with whom he had wonderful dates, but now he has a close friend in love with him.]

It feels rather sweet.

[Romantic. A kindness in this ugly and terrifying world.]

...I hope I can keep you [There's a slightest pause.] happy.

(no subject)

sanguivorous - 2025-06-05 23:29 (UTC) - Expand